Inspirational Emails > Key's To Success Series

Think about it:

Relationships stand or fall on the quality of their communication. People who fail to effectively get their point across often end up frustrated, confused, angry, or all three. Likewise, the recipient of your communication is likely to be confused, startled or hurt if they fail to fully comprehend the intention of your remark, email, call, etc.

Incidentally, do youknow how to judge the effectiveness of your communication? No. It's not that you thought it was clear. The response from the recipient indicates whether you have effectively communicated. No matter how "clear" you thought you were - how were you interpreted? What's "clear" to you often isn't clear to the other, because everyone - and I do mean everyone - processes information differently.

So how do you guide your message through the obstacle course of different perceptions and perspectives? How do you guard against your request or instructions being distorted, deleted, or generalized (three communication screens all humans subconsciously process information thru)?

It's called rapport - the ability to empathetically "step into" someone's world to see how they hear, interpret and integrate. You don't have to agree with their beliefs or perceptions - but you do need to respect them.

Once you "step outside" your own "mental map," and look at the topic through the eyes of your communication partner, you'll understand not only what to say, but how to say it.

A few tips:

-Building rapport takes commitment, work and time.

-When you listen, instead of filling your mind with counter arguments or negative responses, try asking yourself: what are they really trying to say? What is it that they want? What really motivates their communication?

-Men and woman tend to communicate very differently. Men mainly rely on words (articulate or not) women tend to be more "global" - sensitive to tone, body language, facial expressions, "energy," etc. That's why best selling author John Gray says "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" when it comes to communicating.

For further reading check out our bookstore under "Men/Women Issues", "Relationships" and "Success Strategies."

by C.V. Doner

Like this edition of Keys to Success? Send it to a friend

Keys to Success is sent only to those who subscribed to it. If you no longer wish to receive Keys to Success Inspirations, simply click here. This publication may be freely redistributed if copied in its entirety. Portions of this newsletter may be reprinted with permission.