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I once received a note from a man who wrote, "These are the facts, this is what happened, these are the consequences….and if you disagree with me, then you are refusing to face reality." To whose reality was he referring?

And how was it that he was able to escape being a creature of his own history and culture and take a god-like position so as to come to this divinely objective view of reality?

Have you ever sat around with your siblings and discussed past family experiences? How often do you each remember what happened in a totally different light? How often are the details of the experience so contrary to what you each remembered that you secretly said to yourself, "Wow, I had no idea they were all doing drugs at the time…these people have totally rewritten history!" After all, your perceptions of reality ARE the standard for evaluating all other assertions to describing and interpreting reality, aren't they?

Do this. Get together with some friends and play the following game. Tell them you will explain the rules of the game after you are situated. While everyone is watching, you walk into the room, go over to a chair, adjust the chair, maybe look at some paper, play with your watch, take your shoes off, and fiddle around for about 5 minutes. No one knows before hand exactly what you are going to do. Do not even tell them they will have to remember what you did. If possible, film yourself.

When you complete the pantomime, instruct everyone to look under their chairs where they will find a piece of paper and a pencil. They have 15 minutes to write down, in sequential order precisely what you did. After the 15 minutes are up, play the video.

How many things do you think people will remember? I have seen this done in a workshop where the trainer did 26 things. The majority of people only remembered 8 of the things that took place.

So, when you look back on your past and say, "I know what happened"-- do you? When you evaluate someone else's actions, even if you remember every single detail, the fact that you did not know what they were thinking or what their intentions were could still cause you to totally misinterpret the event. Could it not?

Do I think that knowing "reality" is impossible? Yes, I do. I believe our perceptions may approximate reality to various degrees but seeing Reality in all of its complexities, mysterious nuances and such? No. And I believe the more we accept this, the more we will temper our "rightness" and interpretations of events and experiences with humility.

This is not about Truth, but about your perceptions of your self and how to change your experiences by merely changing the frame.

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Written by
Dr. Monte E. Wilson, III
Andrea Higham, Editor
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