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Real Life Lessons

Adding Value For The Joy Of It
By Kathleen Roberts

"Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting." Elizabeth Bibesco

In the world of personal and business coaching, we frequently refer to the concept of "attraction" or being "attractive". This, of course, does not have anything to do with physical appearance, but rather indicates a way to live your life so that the things you want come to you - like bees to honey. Over time, many principles of attitude and behavior have been developed to assist us in becoming more "attractive." Adding Value For The Joy Of It is just one of these principles.

Adding Value in Action

When you enjoy helping people in the way they want to be helped, you are living the essence of this principle.

Frequently, we hold assumptions or ideas about how people "should" be helped or how we want to help them - we have an ulterior motive. When you encounter a too-pushy salesperson, for instance, it's a safe bet they have an idea of how you need to be helped. Some people help others for financial gain or to change their point of view or to get something in return. None of these actions add value simply for the joy of helping. Adding value for the joy of it means that you are making the extra effort simply for the enjoyment you receive, not for any particular reward.

Experiment with Joyful Giving

What are some ways you can cultivate and play with this principle?

• Discover what brings you joy and do lots of it. What are the things that bring you joy? Intellectual pursuits? Volunteering? Solving problems? Creating or designing something? Providing excellent service? When you experience joy in what you do, you are probably adding value to others without even being aware of it
• Find out what brings other people joy - how do they want to be helped? Everyone has their own opinion of what adds value to their life. Just the process of discovering what others value will heighten your awareness, expand your perspective and increase your ability to connect with them.
• Find ways to share the things that bring you joy without expectations. Doing this brings you face to face with the joy of giving for its own sake, as a way to express your personal gifts and talents without any "hooks" attached.

Notice the Result

When you practice this principle yourself, you may become aware of how many people have been adding value to your life all along. You may want to reflect on what this has meant to you and acknowledge them in some way.

You may also begin to notice this principle in action in other areas of your life. It's likely that you know someone at work (maybe it's you?) who always goes the extra mile, not because they "have to" or are looking for some particular reward, but simply because they love the process - giving the best service they can, doing the best work they can, making the finest "widget".

As you notice those who seem to get joy and satisfaction from giving without attachment, ask yourself: "What is it about them that I find attractive?" When you answer this question, you will have given yourself a valuable tool.

Become a Magnet

Symbolically, this principle can be depicted as a circle - a continuous flow. When you give/add value joyfully, you create not only something tangible of value for others, but also more of what you give out - joy, satisfaction, caring - and these very things then come back to you magnified, kind of like a "spiritual chain letter" without the hype, pressure or money! And, of course, this Principle is nothing new. Contained within it is an ancient Truth as well as its "magnetic" quality: Reaping what you sow.

Nourish your Personal Garden

The beauty of the Attraction Principles is that you have nothing to lose by experimenting with them and noticing the result. There is no cost, it's not painful, and there's no obligation - you can always stop practicing.

So if you believe there is something attractive about this Principle, and if you are in the mood to add value to your own life, begin to sow the seeds of Adding Value For The Joy Of It and notice what you harvest.