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Love & Intimacy

Committed Love Relationships
by Kristin Reeg

Am I truly committed to those I love?

My eyes were drawn to this truth as I was reading the other day. "God's love does not come and go. It is constant - based on His commitment to us" (Quiet Walk Devotional). I began to question myself. Am I truly committed to those I love?

I've come to realize that love is more work than an emotion. True love is like a wrecking ball that destroys the barriers between people.

"You can do one of two things in your world. You can a build a wall or you can build a bridge to every person you meet. I'm out to build bridges are you?" said Ann Kiemel Anderson in her book, I'm Out To Change My World.

It's so easy for me to build a wall when what I need to building is a bridge. Allow me to give an example. I have a friend who feels as if the waves of life have overtaken her. I have promised to swim by her, to throw out the life preserver, to just love her. In a moment of boldness I said that she couldn't build a wall high enough or thick enough that the love of Jesus couldn't penetrate. Though this is true, the task becomes more difficult when I'm the one who is supposed to be tangibly showing this love.

Here'swhat happened. My friend was having a rough day, although her face was painted with the "I'm OK" mask. I asked how she was doing. "Fine," she said. Instantly, I felt the drawbridge go up between the two of us. I could almost hear the locks to her heart bolting shut. No way was she going to allow me to penetrate her wall.

So, being the good friend that I am, my first thoughts on the way home were: "Well, fine. If that's the way she wants to be…." I'm sure you can finish my sentence. I was angry. I was hurt. She knew her words were transparent and I could see right through them to the wall behind. From that moment on I vowed to stop calling, to stop visiting, to just leave her alone and only pray for her.

No sooner had the thought escaped my consciousness than the Lord kindly reminded me of my promise. If I truly meant that I wanted to show the love of Jesus to her, why was I willing to give up so soon?

Because it got tough.

I recalled Ann Kiemel Anderson’s words: "Can I love you to Him? Can I love you so much through thick and thin until you learn that Jesus really cares for you? Can I love you to Him?"

True sisterly love waits for the moods to pass. True love knows when to speak and when to be silent. It knows when to push, when to pull, and when to just stand.

Let us begin to love one another the way that Christ loves us.


© 2000 Kristin Reeg

Courtesy of
The Center for the Study of Faith and Culture
College of Communication and the Arts
Regent University &